I'll Miss My Friend Offroadkarter

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CBT said:
Stay away from my car!!!!
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Hahahaha, see ya on the reservation!



I'm going to the bar. I'm sure by the time I get back, this thread will have gone to the great closed-thread graveyard in the sky (aka locked)...but thanks for the entertainment. Even though the thread got silly, there were some good points peppered in the hilarity...
 
Two women are on a transcontinental balloon voyage. Their craft is engulfed in fog, their compass gone awry. Afraid of landing in the ocean, they drift for days. Suddenly, the clouds part to show a sunlit meadow below. As they descend, they see a man walking his dog.

One of the flyers yells to the figure far below, "Where are we?"

The man yells back, "About a half mile from town."

Once again, the balloonists are engulfed in the mist. One flyer says to the other, "He must have been a lawyer."

The other says, "A lawyer! How do you know that?"

The first says, "That’s easy. The information he gave us was accurate, concise, and entirely irrelevant."
 
Spectragod said:
So we're cool on the attorney jokes?
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Ehhh, what the heck. I got one. A cruise ship with a thousand people sank in shark infested waters. The only people not eaten by sharks were a few lawyers. Know why? Professional courtesy. Yeah yeah, lame, but it's the only lawyer joke I know plus it was clean. :)
 
CBT said:
Ehhh, what the heck. I got one. A cruise ship with a thousand people sank in shark infested waters. The only people not eaten by sharks were a few lawyers. Know why? Professional courtesy. Yeah yeah, lame, but it's the only lawyer joke I know plus it was clean. :)
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Unlike your last penile swab.....OHHHH!!!
 
A stingy old lawyer who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness was determined to prove wrong the saying, "You can’t take it with you."

After much thought and consideration, the old ambulance-chaser finally figured out how to take at least some of his money with him when he died. He instructed his wife to go to the bank and withdraw enough money to fill two pillow cases. He then directed her to take the bags of money to the attic and leave them directly above his bed. His plan: When he passed away, he would reach out and grab the bags on his way to heaven.

Several weeks after the funeral, the deceased lawyer’s wife, up in the attic cleaning, came upon the two forgotten pillow cases stuffed with cash.

"Oh, that darned old fool," she exclaimed. "I knew he should have had me put the money in the basement."
 
Spectragod said:
If the comments that I read would get someone "knocked out" then is sounds like there are other issues at hand.

Taking things a lot less personal will get you a lot further in this world, just FYI.
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Agreed.

I didn't see where Ryan singled someone out or used racially insensitive words that would justify the permanent banning.

Whatever, we can argue about this all night and it won't change anything. Ill still miss Ryan and Ill still disagree with his banning.
 
Spectragod said:
A stingy old lawyer who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness was determined to prove wrong the saying, "You can’t take it with you."

After much thought and consideration, the old ambulance-chaser finally figured out how to take at least some of his money with him when he died. He instructed his wife to go to the bank and withdraw enough money to fill two pillow cases. He then directed her to take the bags of money to the attic and leave them directly above his bed. His plan: When he passed away, he would reach out and grab the bags on his way to heaven.

Several weeks after the funeral, the deceased lawyer’s wife, up in the attic cleaning, came upon the two forgotten pillow cases stuffed with cash.

"Oh, that darned old fool," she exclaimed. "I knew he should have had me put the money in the basement."
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I like that one, the accuracy appeals to me :D
 
Funny after he was banned i quickly logged into MCM ...for those on both boards you know i'm never there....expected a HUGE rant...but nothing ...not a peep....
 
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